The last year and a half of my life has been very special. A big part of that is because of a goofy puppy dog who has woken me up with slobbery kisses every day, but mostly it’s because of a girl named Kellie.
This past week… Well over the last few weeks, Kellie and I have been evaluating our relationship together. After taking a long look at things it’s became clear to both of us that our timing just wasn’t matching up. We both love one another immensely, and still are in love with one another… But we are in different places at the moment and time apart is needed. I know I will always love Kellie and she will always be special to me, but she has a lot of growing to do and it’s something she can only do alone.
Leading up to our relationship I found myself growing a lot as a person… Making mistakes, learning more about who I was… Maturing. I felt like I was at a point where I was ready to find “the one”. Yet I know, if I didn’t go through all of that I would not be ready for that stage of my life. It became clear to me as my relationship with Kellie grew that she had not yet gone through that process. Having not taken that step yet in her life left us on two different paths… One person who was ready to move towards “settling down” and another who was not sure they explored all the major questions they had about what they wanted from life.
This choice was far from easy for me, and for her. The past two weeks were emotionally taxing, to say the least and I think we both have questioned if this is the right choice or not a thousand times. But the reality of it is, that we know it is…
I am going to miss waking up next to her every morning. I am going to miss her laugh, the way we connected on the nerdiest levels, the look she could give me from across the room that let me know that she loved me. We shared holidays, birthdays, amazing highs and lows together. We grew very close with each others families and friends and I know I will miss sharing time with them as well. She grew into my best friend, the person I connected with better then anyone else in my life. I am going to miss that connection and I know we both hope we can cross paths again in the future when she gets answers to the questions that are weighing on her. I hope she finds the answers she is looking for..
I will always have a place in my heart for my Kellie-girl.
So here I am at ground zero once again. Ready to explore a new path. I am sad that things didn’t work out but excited about the future. I have an incredible group of friends who have been so supportive. I have the greatest family on the face of the earth. Dana, my ‘lil sis’ has been so good to me and I look forward to getting more involved with the lives of her kids. My Mom and Dad have been incredible and inspire me so much. I love my job and the people I work with. I have been working out and love how I feel. I don’t know what the next year has in store for me but I know I am surrounded by great people who love and support me… And I can’t wait to see what the future brings.
Exclusive video of Walt Disney’s backyard railroad. I hope to have one, one day…